Her name was Josie. 20 years on and I still remember. I think I even remember her last name…McClennen. Yep I believe it was. Maybe, well definitely it is a breech of patient confidentiality for me to say her name, but it has been 20 years.
Pretty much right out of high school I went to work in a state run mental hospital. I worked with chronically ill adult patients. Some of them were very dangerous and had even killed people, but instead of getting sentenced to prison they got deemed criminally insane and given a life long sentence to the psych ward.
Anyway, not all the patients were dangerous. Josie was not dangerous, yet she was never coherent. She was a large black lady in her 50s. I have always found large black ladies to have that special mothering energy and a special way of telling it like it is. There have been many times in my life where I wished I knew someone like that to confide in and seek advise from.
The main thing I remember about Josie is she would say, “Lord have mercy! Lord have mercy!” She always said it twice and she said it with a specific rhythm. I always liked the way she said it. It was nice. So recently I have been using Josie’s special rhythm and have changed the words to suit me. I believe mantras are very helpful and shape our thoughts so I have begun to say, “God has blessed me! God has blessed me!” I say it out loud when I am walking down the street. I say it in my home and one day I will say it in front of others as I clasp my hands together as Josie did.
Thank you Josie where ever you are dear one!
This is not Josie, but the lovely lady does embody the energies that I so admire.
MsAnthrope
I remember a gentle, sweet older hispanic woman from my days at a state hospital, when I was about the age you were when you worked at one, so, much longer ago. I am sure she is dead now, so I will say her name, which I thought beautiful, Maria de la Luz Rodriguez. She spoke no English and I spoke no Spanish, but we communed. I remember at Christmas I took her a flannel nightgown and bath powder for presents. She was on an inner custodial ward, the kind that don't exist anymore, and that you never saw, but I never read her case file (I don't know why. I read many, especially of the people who had been there for years and years.) so I don't know how she ended up there. I never saw one sign of mental problems or antisocial behavior in her, but of course I never knew a word she said. She will appear in my book as La Paloma de la Luz.
But what you said about the advice reminded me of something. I was about fourteen the first time I read Gone With the Wind and very socially inappropriate. Mammy in the book was always telling Scarlett what to do and say to be popular and I was so envious because I thought that if I had someone like that all my troubles in that way would be over.